Tossing and Twisting

I’m not gonna lie.  I like a sweet treat every now and again.  A chocolate chip cookie or sugar-icing cupcake is a good way to end a meal. However, getting those cookies and cupcakes has become a little unsettling.

Last week I got an invitation to a work picnic and with it came a request for me to bring something to share with my fellow picnickers. Unlike Martha Stewart, I opted to share something made by a local baker who worked for Sam.  No, not Uncle Sam, just Sam. I don’t buy anything that comes from people who work for Uncle Sam.

Sam’s baker sold a large box of chocolate chip cookies and I decided that would be my ‘something to share’ at the picnic.  Besides, if the picnickers didn’t eat all of them I’d have a few left over to enjoy the following week.  I carefully selected a box of 50 cookies and made sure none them were broken.  I gently placed the box in my shopping cart and headed to the checkout counter. I placed my prized soon-to-be possession on the belt along with a few other items. I was still emptying my cart when Sam’s checker-outer starting ringing up my stuff.  I looked over just as she tossed my cookies into a bag and laid them upside down on top of the bag twirler. I reached over, grabbed the bag, uprighted my cookies, and gently placed them back in my cart. I pushed the buttons to pay my bill, Sam’s checker-outer added the remaining bags to my cart and in the process, tossed my cookies one more time. She clearly didn’t know I was going to put those on a fancy tray and serve them as my ‘something to share’ at the upcoming picnic.

Fast-forward a few days when I went to another store to buy sugar-icing cupcakes.  There were seven of them arranged in a plastic cake-like container with a clear lid.  No, I wasn’t gonna eat seven cupcakes by myself. I was having guests over and like I said, I’m not Martha Stewart. Anyway, this time the guy who checked me out bagged the cupcakes, twisted the container, and placed it sideways in the kid seat on the cart. I know, this would be the perfect place to write something funny about grabbing his bag because he twisted my cupcakes, but that would get me into trouble and I don’t need that kind of trouble over a fabulously funny story about buying sweet treats.

Yeah, it was an unsettling week of buying sweet treats. I’ve never had anyone toss my cookies before and I didn’t even know it was possible. I suspect I’ve had my cupcakes twisted but I can’t say for sure so it mustn’t have been that memorable. The truth is, I didn’t want or need all that tossing and twisting. All I wanted was a sweet treat to enjoy every now and again and to pass off as my own. After all, I’m not Martha Stewart.

Thanks for reading and remember to share the laughter. Now, I’m going to eat a cookie.

Not Martha…but Eliza G.


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